Si te enfadas, pierdes. ES

Carmen López

Psychologist. Master in Human Resources.

 

 

Looking for talent doesn't mean that you have to read a lot of curriculums, but to follow the trace it leaves: An excellent work. Because the most important thing is not what you learn, or the companies in which you have worked in. The most important thing is what you do. 

You need five things to make your work exceptional: Energy, focus, time, creativity and an total commitment to quality. 
 

Behind these five pillars there's just one thing: Motivation. Motivation is the difference between the world champion and the second classified. Motivation makes a runner run to the finish line when he has no more stamina left, a climber reach an impossible summit, a creator fight against himself until his work is perfect. With motivation you find time where there's no more time, motivation keeps your energy level and your focus at the highest level, and makes you see the world differently. When you are motivated you are capable of throwing away an almost finished work and starting it again until it is excellent. 

The motivation is generated by the necessity. It's clear: If someone is hungry, no doubt he will put all his mental, physical and time resources to satisfy that necessity. The necessity is the motive; the necessity shoots the motivation up. This isn´t new. In the 1930's, Abraham Maslow proposed a theory about the human needs. According to it, the people who mobilize their resources do it on account of a necessity: Eating, sex, money, belonging, acknowledgement or self-realization. 

 

But to find the source of Talent we have to look beyond the necessity. There´s no doubt that the physical needs subjugate the rest: Hunger, thirst, to avoid pain... but in developed economies, these needs are very often covered. Most of the people are motivated by the superior needs in the Maslow Pyramid: Money, power, belonging, freedom, acknowledgement or self-realization. And how the marketing experts and the sales people know very well, the needs can be created, changed or slanted. You just need to control one thing: the beliefs. If someone is absolute convinced about something he becomes unstoppable. 
 

The beliefs are the origin of everything else. 

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Imagina esta situación: Tras leer un email, recibir una noticia o tener una conversación te sientes atacado.
En décimas de segundo segregas hormonas del estrés que te hacen sentir mal, casi enfermo, y focalizas toda tu atención en lo que interpretas como un ataque. Es natural, es una respuesta que surge automáticamente de nuestro cerebro primitivo.
 
Para rebajar tu malestar tu primera reacción es contraatacar, pero lo más probable es que cometas un error. Puede que estes interpretando mal el mensaje, puede que tú reacción sea desmedida, y puede que estropees para siempre una relación importante.
 
Como puedes rebajar tu malestar y a la vez conseguir responder de manera efectiva?

Haz lo siguiente:
 
1. Escribe inmediatamente lo que dirías a esa persona. Traslada toda tu rabia al papel. Cuando termines, la primera sorpresa será que tu nivel de estrés ha bajado. Al exteriorizar tu malestar, tu cerebro interpreta que te estas defendiendo, y rebaja la secreción de hormonas. 

2. Olvidare del tema hasta el día siguiente. Así conseguimos calmarnos aun mas.
3. Al día siguiente, analiza de nuevo con calma lo que esa persona te ha dicho.
4. Repasa lo que escribiste la noche anterior.
5. Vuelve a preparar tu reacción. Ahora estas en la mejor posición para responder de forma adecuada y salir ganando de la situación. Hablar calmado da mucho mas peso a tus argumentos.

Recuerda:Se puede expresar cualquier cosa de forma calmada.
Si te enfadas, pierdes.