Psychologin. Master in Human Resources.
self-worth is the most important human psychological need. What we think about ourselves predicts our happiness, and also our chances of success. This is how we normally build self-worth:
We have an ability,
we are worthy.
A -> P -> W
Ability -> Performance -> Worth
Unconsciously, chances are that you think that you
depend on your ability to be valuable and worthy.
If your skills don’t coincide your own expectations, or worse, people’s expectations, then, your self-worth goes down.
This is a problem, because when your Self-Worth is down, it becomes a
self-ful.filling prophecy: You don’t believe you are capable, so why try?
It’s clear, this is not the best mental model to get to your goals, because is based on fear to failure.
In reality, your worth is not proportional to your ability, but to your quality as a human being. -That’s why people close to you, love you! Are you kind? Are you helpful? Are you generous? Are you a good father? A good boss? Do you take care of your people? Of your colleagues? Your clients? If your answer is yes, you are already worthy!
If we acknowledge this, we can change the equation putting Worth first:
Worth -> Ability -> Performance
W -> A -> P
You are already worthy as human being, so, like all human beings, if your ability is low, it doesn’t matter: You can develop it, perform at a high level and succeed. You deserve success, because you are worth it. You just need to put the work because there are no more mental walls on your way to your goal.
Worth, Ability, Performance. With this mental model, you are willing to run toward your goals, instead of running from failure. You will be motivated with hope, instead of fear.