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Most people don’t need a psychologist in the same way most people don’t need a doctor. Sometimes, however, a bone is broken, muscle aches or your body doesn’t work properly. Then it is clear that you need to look for professional help. When your body is on the line, understanding that you need help and looking for it is a no-brainer.
When your mind is on the line, however, the thing is trickier. Knowing that you need help in the first place, and looking for it in the second, is a long road that most people just take when it’s too late and the damage is too big.
These are the reasons people give to me (or to themselves) for not needing a psychologist:
„I don’t need a psychologist because…
1. … when I’m stressed out I go out for a run and it helps“
2. … when I’m down I talk with my friends and I feel better“
3. … I meditate to control my anxiety. That’s enough“
The three first reasons, sport, social contact, and meditation are fantastic tools to keep you mentally balanced. I recommend it to most of my clients. Keep doing it! However, they treat the symptoms, in the same way, paracetamol treats pain and fever. They don’t solve the problem.
Conflict, shyness, low self-esteem, bullying, burnout, powerlessness, and other mental and interpersonal situations are solved when you work through your fears, thoughts, behaviors and beliefs, develop a strategy, and follow the necessary steps. Here is where professional help can change your life and your work.
„I don’t need a psychologist because…
4. … I’m strong. I have to solve my problems by myself“
5. … I’m not crazy!“
6. … I’m not paying to talk to someone. I better invest the money elsewhere“
7. … I’m ashamed. Can’t talk about my problem to anyone“
The four last reasons are mostly subconscious, and are related to beliefs that keep us stuck:
“I’m strong. I have to solve my problems by myself“: Being alone carrying all the weight over your shoulders is one of the most corrosive feelings you can have. We cannot do everything by ourselves. We need experts that guide you and give you the tools you need to change. We need a different point of view to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Asking for help is for the strong.
I’m not crazy! You are not useless for having a fever. In the same way, you are not crazy for visiting a psychologist. Crazy would be having a problem and not trying to solve it, don’t you think? Do not fear what people will think if you work with a psychologist either. They will never know until you tell them. We are legally obligated to keep confidentiality.
I’m not paying to talk to someone. I better invest the money elsewhere. Of course, it’s your money and you have the liberty to put it wherever you want. Just think about what is your most valuable asset, and where you obtain the biggest Return On Investment. I give you here an example: I have clients that have followed my Leadership Program for four months. One hour per week. They have been promoted after these four months for a fraction of the cost and the time of a Master. Tailor-made solutions can be extremely cost-effective.
I’m ashamed. Can’t talk about my problem to anyone. Experienced psychologists have heard everything, believe me. Your case is something I’m sure I work on at least on a monthly basis. We all are humans. Your problem is shared by a lot of people. Keeping it hidden will not make it disappear.
Business Psychology helps you solve personal and interpersonal problems at work. But not just that. It gives you tools to grow and advance toward your goals. Changing the way you feel, think, and behave can change your life for the better.
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